I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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