Midget sex pt 2 tonight
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize
