So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize
