this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I have fence marks all over my body
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
