Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
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i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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