I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
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