i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
