Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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