do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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