I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
