You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
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STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
When are your genitals available?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize