i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
