Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
