he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize