i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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