At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
