I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
