Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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