It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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