Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
The adults are the big ones right?
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
