'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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