whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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