So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize