i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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