question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
