That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize