Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
