And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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