You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
