I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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