he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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