Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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