sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
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