Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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