I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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