That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize