I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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