So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
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