just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize