I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Shame - the story of my life.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
