The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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