remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Randomize
