Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
