is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I need a burrito and a hug.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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