Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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