I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
