one might say we're banned from that church
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
