She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize