Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Randomize
