a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
His hands were made for my vagina.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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